You can leave your hat on! – Kurious Kittens

This was my first ever strip show I have ever attended and I was quite apprehensive from the beginning and nervous in what we was going to encounter but yet curious.

Upon arriving at Kurious Kittens we see a line full of eager ladies yearning to see hot blooded men.  The security man at the door that was checking us in was quite abrupt with us girls why I don’t know but I felt he was unpleasant plus my name was missing from the list for some strange reason.  We walked down these stairs and to the reception where we handed in our coats and bags if we so wished. We went through to the stage area and all the tables downstairs had reserved on them so I asked one of the men that worked there if we could sit there and he said anywhere and I questioned about the reserved signs but he said “that’s for all you ladies” so we sat down.  After sipping on our free champagne (well cheap prosecco) we was confronted by a lady with a clipboard who asked if we had reserved the table. After a discussion we was told we could not sit there unless we had pre-booked or was prepared to pay over £50 per head on drinks.  This was very steep for us so we was sent upstairs in where we was told there would be plenty of chairs and space but there was not. One of us even did not have a chair and the balcony area was very small and hard to see the stage from the balcony due to the lighting.  So I went back downstairs to speak to the lady with the clipboard again to explain about the seating and she said that they had to bring some of the chairs down from their to accommodate people downstairs which I felt was rude and inconsiderate. If I had known that we had to meet a bar tab to sit downstairs then I might of not booked this show that they were laying on that night.  Thankfully one of my friends I was with bumped into a friend who had a reserved space near the back of the room and they let us join them and told us not to worry about the bar tab.  Throughout the night I did not see people who was nearer the front in the reserved seats spending over £5o a head so in a way I do feel like us ladies were cheated.

The show itself was an eye opener that was for sure. The host a sexy woman (but I think she was a man) introduces each performer before they come on stage but with some singing and seduction from herself before each performance. She was not what I was expecting though as the poster showed a very big drag queen which never appeared during the night and the men that was shown on the poster was not even performing on the night so the poster was misleading.

The first man to come out on stage was dressed as a policemen “Hello, Hello, Hello”.  Lights flashing, sirens going and hearts racing. He arrests one of the ladies in the audience and gives her a good inspection. After he started to dance and strip down to his boxers.  He then disappears for a split moment to the back of the stage and comes bouncing on with boxing gloves on. Rocky eat your heart out.  He started to punch the air and jolt about. After his little performance he then took his boxers off and seductively revealed his massive long truncheon. I did not know where to look I felt like I was now under arrest as my eyes could not take it.

The second man to come on stage was dressed like the great Mr Grey of Fifty Shades.  He was dressed smart in his grey suit. One item by one he starts to take off.  When he is nearly down to his boxers he pulls up a lady and lays her down on stage where he starts to seductively lick cream of her body (she is protected by plastic).  After his seduction on the now hot blooded young lady who’s legs had know turned to jelly whilst walking back to her seat he starts to reveal what he has in his briefcase.  His pencil was so long it came down to his knees practically I had to rub my eyes with astonishment.

The final man of the night was Papabear and now he really is a bear. Lumber Jack like with his dungarees,  big build, muscly, manly and bald. I just love bald men.  My heart really started to pound big time for him I felt like roaring out to say bear hug me. He was everything that I like in a man I best not let my husband know. I loved his performance with the fire eating to the liquid that he poured on himself.  My heart was pounding away and when he danced over certain girls I just kept thinking wish that could be me in his bear type hands.  When it came to the big reveal he really was hung like a animal very large and thick but that was not what was the main thing for me about him it was his whole performance and look he was just so lush I would of loved to of given him a bear hug.

When the show had finished us ladies could all get our photo with the three men.  No guessing who I chose to stand right next to. Yes that’s right Papabear.  My other two friends stood with their favourites in the group picture we had.  We were both all feeling hot, hot, hot being with those men.

After every hot blooded lady had their photo taken a after show performance of sexy burlesque ladies and pole performing ladies started to lay on a show.

Would I go back I am not sure as I do felt like we was not treated very nicely from the security card at the door lady with the clipboard after all we all paid and it should not be based in where you sit depending on how much you are willing to spend on drinks at the end of the night.  The only reason that I might ever consider in going back is purely to see Papabear, grrrrrrrrrrrr really really did get my heart pumping.

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